George Bush and Stephen Harper Reveal Strategy to Enlist Allies

Disassociated Press

Aquaman's Palace somewhere beneath the sea - The underwater kingdom of the North American Justice League headed by Poo-Bah Bush and Head Chef Harper have released their methods of selecting allies to trash journalists. "Basically, because there are so many countries that we can't all be friends with, we've decided that the only fair way to determine who our enemies will be would be to determine who had the stinkiest cheese," Mr. Harper said. For his part, Mr. Bush added, "So far, Holland, Switzerland and France can all kiss our asses with their stinky cheese." It is unclear what the decision was on Italy as both men are known to sprinkle various Italian cheeses, including Pecorino, on their toast.