Thursday, July 20, 2006

Zipper location angers French

Disassociated Press

Marseille, France - Jacques Chirac was sent to hospital after his pubic hair got caught after he zipped up. "He is resting. It was quite traumatic for him. I never heard him yell so loud. Well, not since losing his contracts in Iraq," said his wife through a translator. A lawyer representing Chirac told Moon Zuppa through a different translator, "we will be suing the Italian jean maker who designed the pants. Here in France we've decided that the zipper should be placed off to the side as opposed to the middle. Once again we must civilize les Italiens." Moon Zuppa asked his wife why Chirac keeps his pubes so long. She denied that they were in fact long. However, she did oddly add, "I like to chew on them during our love making."

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