Washington -Acting on several complaints, a minority rights organization has filed an official grievance with Amnesty International. "We've had two or three vocal calls from people awfully distressed. This is the 21st century. Unhappiness should not be accepted. What has this world come to?" lamented Elaine Ruggers, a lawyer representing the people filing the suit. Moon Zuppa asked her which products were deemed offensive. "The first is with Colgate-Palmolive," Ms. Ruggers told us. "Ivory soap is for white people. I want a soap that reflects my color. Ebony would be more appropriate. I never realized how racist soap could be. The other is with Irish Spring. What? Only the Irish have spring? The Irish are pugilistic drunkards and therefore are not worthy of a soap. Our alternative solution is Sri Lankan or Mexican spring." Amnesty, for their part, issued a report that stated, "We are very disturbed by these allegations and will be working with authorities on the matter. Doves we ain't. Get it? Doves, soap....?"
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