General Manager Trades Team: Keeps Coach

In an unprecedented move in professional sports, General Manager Spinnle Gangbrat traded away his whole team after its 17th consecutive loss. "They say it's easier to fire the coach and keep the team. I say they are wrong." Head Coach Cutie Hopan was not surprised by the move. "All they (players) ever cared about were the pretties over at the Big Swallow."

The Marine Bay Leaf Moulds of the Backbush Appalachian Mountain League are mired in one of the worst losing streaks in the two-year history of the franchise. "It's like, bad." star forward Lenny Le Mure lamented just before answering his cell phone last night after the record breaking loss. How bad? "Real bad. My momma bad."

"In his contract year Mr. Gangbrat is sending a strong message to himself" remarked local baker, comedian, friend to all and long time beat writer for the Moulds' Saul Oxcrud. "I think he's sending a real message to his coach." Despite the turmoil, Marine Bay is still in the hunt for a playoff spot as the other clubs in their division have yet to win a game themselves.

"I think I'll be alright" assured the man known around here as Paw for his love of animal paws. "I love these guys though," he confided with a tear streaming down his cheek.

"It's been a real tough year" Hopan added. "We're just going to roll up our sleeves and move forward." How will they get players in time for tonight's game? "There are many folks around here who would play for free since they are already unemployed. I'm not worried."

In the dressing room Lenny LeMure was clearing out his things. "Luckily, I'm the best player here. These gorgeous teeth are keeping the endorsements coming." Gangbrat looks over and smiles "All four of them?"

With very little time to put together a team of scabs, Hopan was nonetheless confident and upbeat. "Man, it may be quiet but the attitude is better already." Marine Bay play the Des Moines Baby Donkey's tonight. The Asses are a team heading in the same direction as the Leafs and Gangbrat's moves have their GM thinking. "You know. All it takes is one bold move to shake and bake."

Yes, it does and we will see if this latest bold move pays off.