Friday, October 28, 2016

Parti Quebecois Wants Apple Name Change

The pant shitting around the English language by the PQ and its xenophobic and fan base continues. In an effort to make sure he's not soft on having a bad ass stance against Englis new leader Jean Francois Lisee has called for Apple to change its name to respect Quebec clients. Armed with Huggies wipes, here's part of his speech.

'It's only good for business and shows respect. It's not like we're asking them to change fruit or logo. We're just asking them to use Pomme instead. It's very confusing for our little population who are constantly being misled. The other day I received a letter from a little pas - Ti Jean - who wondered why English-Canada was sooo bad towards him. It touched me deep down to see so many of our kids be hurt by the thoughtlessness of greedy American capitalism and the lackey's who support them in English Canada. I responded to Ti Jean and promised him I'd deal with it. Another letter came from Ma Tante La Bouffe who happened upon a Dairy Queen hoping to find sellers of miniature cow dildos and milk. She was quite upset when she found an ice-cream shop! This is not the only story I have heard. Across the province Quebecers are being fooled by misleading store front signs and it has to stop. This is why we're calling on all these corporations that during their board room meetings they consider our sensibilities. Are we not customers too? Also, we will be looking to ban the term 'bon week-end'. We feel too much English is creeping into our dialect interpretation of the French language.

Thank you and mange la merde!

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