Kofi Annan asks for Forgiveness. Son wasn't Popular in School

In the wake of the United Nations Oil-for-Food scandal, Secretary General Kofi Annan (affectionately known as Koko to his friends) pleaded to reporters that while he was disappointed, his son deserves the benefit of the doubt. "I ask for forgiveness. My son, is a complex man."

Kojo Annan (Koko jr. to his entourage) was implicated in a scandal that saw billions of dollars in kickbacks end up in the hands of his staff and UN officials. When asked about is alleged role in the scam he replied "Money? Oh, that money. Was that wrong? Did the Iraqi's not get the food? If not, I demand an inquiry. I was not aware of this failure. My suspicion is that the Americans are behind this."

When asked if the UN will take responsibility for the actions of corrupt officials Annan would only answer "My son wasn't very popular in school. I don't think he was all that bright. I never went to student teacher night. He has always been vulnerable to shysters as he chased popularity. Maybe those braces at 13 weren't such a good idea."

"How do you feel about keeping food out of the mouths of innocent Iraqi's to fill your pockets?" Koko jr. was asked. "I did not personally keep bread from them. If they were really hungry they would have found a way. I think the American army was eating all the food." Finally, in a strange twist, Koko jr. was asked about his grades in school to which he could only offer an incoherent reply while running away but tripped soon after. "I did not sell those slaves! Please, I do not want to stay after school. Do you know who my father is? He'll sell you down the Zaire River on credit!"

Observing this sad turn of events, Koko remarked "Poor, junior. He never was that strong a runner."